Face Beneath the Waves
by Athena Puget
Summary: Sean (Spot) doesn't want to spend another Christmas alone. (Spot/Racetrack aka Sean/Tony)


**Aye, it's been a while but I haven't had much inspiration...**

**I own nothing, this never happened, this is a work of fiction.**

If you asked Sean how he ended up on the beach at three o'clock in the morning Christmas Eve night he would honestly tell you he had no idea.

When he moved to Southern California months prior, leaving everyone he knew hundreds of miles away, he never suspected he could feel this lonely about spending Christmas by himself. He wasn't religious. He didn't particularly like people. And he certainly didn't like the thought of Christmas (the only time of year people could be complete assholes in the name of giving and joy). But here he was, sitting along a cold stone sea wall with the dark waves crashing before his eyes.

The ocean, to him, had been a comforting punishment for years. After the death of his best friend and first crush, Tony, Sean had kept a terrible fear of mother ocean. It had been a beautiful day, and despite it being December, the air was unseasonably warm. Their mothers told them not to go to the pier without supervision because neither knew how to swim; a rule they never actually followed.

Today was no different. The pair had been innocent adolescents, horsing around on the long wooden structure overlooking the ocean in Northern California before Tony unexpectedly fell over the railing. Sean could do nothing but watch in terror and cry for help as his friend sank below the water. Others jumped in, attempting to save the boy, but it was too late. His friend was gone, along with Sean's childhood. Despite many swimming and first aid courses in the following years, Sean's inability to save his only friend would haunt him for the rest of his life.

Sean shook his head as he came back to the present. He took a deep breath, smelling in the sea air and wishing it would somehow calm his sore heart, as it did with many other problems he experienced throughout his life...but somehow it did nothing. The sea air would not bring him to his family, who he missed most dearly. It would not bring friends to his apartment to drink eggnog and watch "Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer". It would not bring him the comfort he so desperately sought after. Tonight, it brought him nothing.

Never in his life had he been so unhappy. Never felt so cold, or alone. He had thought moving to Southern California was the right decision, that it was what he needed to do, that it would finally make him happy; but in this moment he couldn't help but question where his life was going. He couldn't help but wonder if living at all was the right decision for him anymore.

That was it, he had decided; he should just end his life. He had nothing to live for, no one to love. With a somber sigh Sean lifted himself from the sea wall that had become his only friend, and began to walk along the deserted boardwalk. He came upon the set of stairs that lead to to the pier and stopped for a moment. It had been nearly ten years since he set foot on a structure of this kind; but he only felt it was fitting that he would end his life the way Tony's did so many years ago.

Not being a normal trek for him, Sean felt unused to the creaky boards beneath him. Despite knowing the safety of the thousand foot structure before him, Sean still felt unnerved standing atop the crashing ocean below him. However, his decision was made, he wanted this. He would be with Tony again. Something deep within the core of his heart moved his feet along the wooden boards of the pier, guided only by the moon shining above him.

As he walked along he continued to feel the undying loneliness as it crept deeper into his bones, cooling him from within. It was only when he looked up that he noticed a figure far in the distance, standing at one of the ends where the pier T-ed out. Normally, Sean would take this situation on with caution. Most of the time the only people who hung out at the pier at this time of night were junkies or homeless people; and Sean wasn't exactly the picture of self-defense. That same feeling, however, the one that drew him down the pier in the first place; told him not to run, not to turn around and head back to where he came.

He stood for a moment, and watched the figure, which Sean realised was a man around his age. The figure leaned forward, over the pier, just staring at the ocean, much like Sean had done only minutes prior. Neither spoke, just stood with the man watching the sea, and Sean watching the man.

In that moment Sean wondered what brought this man by himself to the pier on Christmas. Was he alone, like Sean was? Did he want to be alone? Was Sean somehow intruding on his personal moment? However, before the brunette could think anymore on the subject, the wood below him cursed him by creaking loudly.

It took a moment for the man to turn around, but surely enough he did. When Sean's eyes met this man's, he was met with icy brown, and a familiar sadness like Sean had not seen in years. Sean wanted to call out to him. To ask him if he was alright, if he needed help, if he needed someone to care for him. However, before either was able to exchange a word, the man was over the edge of the pier.

Sean had no idea what happened at first. One moment the man was in front of him, and the next he had hoisted himself over the railing and threw himself into the cold ocean. No thoughts ran through Sean's head before he too had jumped into the water; he would not let this happen again. He would save a life, even if it couldn't be Tony's or his own.

The waves around him splashed above Sean's head, encompassing him in a freezing bath of chilling water. He felt no pain, however, as he frantically searched for the other man. Finally able to gain his balance in the water he lifted his head and searched for a figure in the dark. Beginning to lose hope, Sean finally spotted something about ten feet away from him.

With every fiber of his being Sean pushed toward the other man, ducking his head under the water not to be carried further away from the being he so desperately fought to help. What felt like hours later Sean was able to latch his arm around the other man, who did not fight, nor aid Sean in his attempt to bring their two bodies together.

Even more concerned about the other human's well being, Sean firmly grabbed the man around his waist, pushing through the water with a strength he never knew he had. In that moment Sean wondered if this would ever end. Sean knew something would have to happen after this moment, but he had no idea what it was. Would they both drown in the freezing waters around them? Would Sean save this man? What would happen after they got out of the water? All Sean could do was push. Push to save this stranger the way he couldn't save his friend.

When they finally reached the shore Sean was exhausted. With the last shred of his energy Sean pulled the other man onto the sand and dropped them both where they laid in safety. Pulling off his shirt, Sean did the same with the other man, pressing their bodies together in attempt to gain any warmth possible while now laying in the dark December sand.

With no response from the man, Sean began to rub his face, "Hey, hey, are you alright? Are you awake?" A few moments later he heard a grunt from the man, who soon after opened his eyes to stare directly into Sean's. Sean took a deep breath, relieved, "You're awake...are you alright?"

"You saved me…" the man replied, his arm reaching up to touch the forearm that was still hovering above him.

"Of course I did...you jumped in the ocean! Why did you do that?" Sean said, his eyes filling with disbelief.

The man did not respond with words, but just removed his hand from Sean's forearm and used it to grab the back of Sean's neck. Pressing their lips together he surprised Sean with the most heated kiss of his young life. Too shocked to do anything differently, Sean kissed the other man back.

As their tongues began to dance Sean felt the man's hand fall to his lower back, where they began to press into one another. Sean's head was reeling. Never in his life had he kissed a stranger, let alone one who had just plunged himself in in the dark ocean; but something about this moment felt right. The kiss was long, and heavy; perfect.

When they pulled back Sean could not help but be confused, "Why?" he asked but the man just shook his head.

"You saved me. I don't blame you, I never blamed you…" He took Sean's face in his hands, "You saved me, now you need to save yourself…I will be with you again, but not tonight..." Sean's confusion shone through in every one of his features before the man got up and walked into the night without another word.

When Sean got up to follow him the man had disappeared into the darkness. The only thing Sean could do was pick up his shirt and reach for his pocket, where hopefully his phone was not completely destroyed by the water damage. There he found his phone dry as a bone, wrapped around a gold chain with a charm reading, "A.H.". The same one Tony had worn the day he had drowned nearly ten years ago, but had been lost in the ocean.

Shaken, Sean placed the charm around his neck and walked back to his apartment to celebrate Christmas; not feeling alone for the first time in years.


End file.
